Just a Cotton-Pickin' Minute Here

I liked the title of your last post, honey, BUT you were only half right in how you characterized me (and even Shirky, who goes further than I do). Specifically:

>>They claim women won't achieve the success we want without tooting our horn
Yes absolutely.

>>and cheating.
No. I didn't say or mean that.

>>We need to boast
Yes absolutely

>>and even lie about our capacities and accomplishments
I didn't say lie. Shirky did, but he means a yes to "can you handle this job?" when you're not sure. That's not really a lie in my view; more of a gamble, and a responsibility to scramble and make your bold statement true.

>>Bravado yields recognition, promotion and big bucks.
Absolutely. Do you disagree? Do you have a plan for changing this?

>>Isn't this what's known as selling one's soul?
No. It's confidence -- the same confidence women always say they want in the men they date. If you have two job applicants with equal qualifications, and one is confident they can handle it while the other isn't, which would you choose?

I don't like arrogance, self-promotion, and relentless drive to get ahead. But as Shirky says, these traits are very common among successful people. You may say that many people including you (and possibly more women than men) would rather not succeed than become that obnoxious. Fine. But then you can't complain that women don't make as much money, rise to the tops of organizations, etc.

Is that what you want?

Women need to be more evil

Looking at our last two posts, I figured out how to crack the glass ceiling: women need to be move evil.

I don't mean sneaky, snarky, stab-you-in-the-back with a smile; that happens all the time. I'm talking flat-out, yeah I'm selfish, try-and-stop-me OWNING IT. Can you think of any examples, in all of history, literature, or film? Cruella de Ville is the exception that proves the rule, and she's, well, a bit cartoony. Even Leona Helmsley saw herself as the champion of cute little doggies.

Instead, women instinctively claim the moral high ground, like Governor Granholm chastising men for having affairs (with women). And women are the harshest judges of other women. Someday, when any mom can go to divorce court and let her ex take full custody so she can focus on her career -- or even just say she's happy to get back to work because her baby is wearing her out -- without apology, we will have taken the final step to equality. Because no one blinks when men do these things. But the risk of hearing "BAD MOTHER" whispered in the background hamstrings women's choices.

It's similar with fiction. Why are more characters men? Probably many reasons, but one is that a writer never has to apologize for, or justify, male characters. A lot of women characters attract visceral anger, especially if they are bad guys. (See, my mind naturally filled in bad... guys for strong, mean characters.) Anyone who creates such a woman risks being called misogynist or unrealistic. Male characters can be angels or antichrists, and it will never occur to anyone to question the author's choices.

Men are just like that, sometimes. When women can be just like that, sometimes -- for any value of that -- then the glass ceiling will be gone.